Sometimes or should I say often times, life has a way of changing ones trajectory especially when you let go.
Letting go is one of the most difficult challenges that we face as beings residing in human earth suits. It is the core of great pain and great wounding that and grief, which is again about letting go.
When you let go of a loved one, either through death or breakup or misadventure of some kind, its tests your soul, your spirit and your resilience.
Letting go is easily said by many new age quotes…. yet most find it incredibly difficult to actually do.
Being a human is about learning about ‘being a human’. Letting go is one of the biggest lessons this earthly incarnation offers. So many paths refer to it and its importance and much of the learning is in the actual experience itself. Theory can intellectually help one understand but in general is not so helpful in the actual ‘art of letting go’. The actual process of letting go enriches the soul and we are all at different stages of this learning curve, for some the process takes longer depending on what one is letting go of. Certain areas of life it can be easier yet not in others.
Letting go can be equated to what can be referred to as a ‘little death’. From a shamanistic viewpoint there are many little deaths scattered throughout our lives. The shaman themselves moves through a massive death to rebirth in order to be of service. Many cannot move through that kind of spiritual death, and really for those that say ‘I want to be a shaman’ BEWARE; it’s a challenging and a deeply profoundly disturbing ride at times. Don’t ever wish that upon yourself.
I refer to myself as a Contemporary Shaman because I have not come through the traditional pathway of the original people or descended from a lineage of shamans. However my inner death was deeply disturbing and profound which totally changed my trajectory in life. Spirit ushered me into the shaman’s path and so much of my old Auric skin was shed it hurt beyond belief. Now when I look back I can see how it formed my path of service to assist in soul trauma recovery and I am eternally grateful for the shedding.
Recently I felt compelled to let go of the home I was living in by the sea. Spirit was prodding at me from different directions. I like many others tend to get comfortable in my nook but the prodding kept coming within and without. So on my earth birthday I took myself off to a peaceful beautiful Tibetan retreat for a few days, one day was a course on Tibetan view to mental health which I totally absorbed as they honor the shamanic perspective and the other my day of birth… The inner prodding was clearly felt within the surrounding compassionate vibration of the retreat and without any struggle at all I decided to let go of my home by the sea that I had been renting for eight years. I had booked to run a training previously so both happened simultaneously.
I was packing up and setting up for running a two-day training. Sleep was a challenge as I had so many lists running around in my head even though I had written everything down.
People close to me were asking ‘So what are you going to do?’ All I knew was the first stage, I would go into the sacred caldera of a mountain and help a spirit sister type up her novel for two months whilst staying in a funky, wonderful converted van with a big verandah in the midst of nature. After that I had no idea. Sure trainings would be a part of it, Skype sessions, journey sessions where I could and possible collaborations…but nothing set in stone so to speak.
Then in the midst of my letting go of my home, packing and running Contemporary Soul Retrieval Training, I heard from my older brother saying my 83-year-old mother was very down and not well due to a chest infection. Right in the middle of it all. To be honest I had a momentary meltdown and said to my brother, you get on a plane just this once and go there, this is the one time I can’t. My mother told me she was ok, but I knew she wasn’t. After the training finished I loaded all my belonging, moved all my stuff into storage with some help from a few pals and booked a flight to see her. The hills could wait a week.
Yesterday after much crying on both our parts and me demanding she let me in to look after her (like many loving mothers she does not want to burden her children), it has been decided that after my two months in the hills will move to live with her, sound proof the en suite double room (she likes the TV loud and it does my head in) and be here for her as a carer and companion in her last years, making sure I take a week or a week and a half off a month to retreat, to be with friends, to do sessions and trainings in different locations. Which is healthy for us both. Oh yes and get a cat.
Trajectory changing yet again.
The thing is when it was decided I suddenly felt the incredibly strong presence of my father who had left his body fifteen years ago; it brought tears to my eyes. This is was my next path of service and he was so very glad.
This change will bring other opportunities and my service to others will not stop it just may be altered somewhat. I have seen others be self-sacrificing but depressed at the changes life can bring, but it doesn’t have to be that way. This is an opportunity to both be here for the woman who has been there for me since she carried me in her womb (and who knows how many lives before that) and look at adapting how I run my service to others. I love teaching and education trainings that I run. I love offering Skype sessions to those in need and I love doing session work (that may just be in a more concentrated one week a month format) It’s just a different trajectory and a new skin I am growing.
The place my mother lives in not my favorite place at all, but I will seek out things to nourish my soul, buy myself warmer boots and coats and make the space I will sleep in, my kind of sacred nook that reflects my soul.
Adapting is part of the human path as is letting go but that does not mean you need to lose yourself along the way, you just transform as you go and allow yourself to grieve that which you are letting go of. It’s paramount to NOT lose yourself, as then your service will be half-hearted, somewhat broken and can lead to resentment, which is no service at all to you or anyone else.
Letting go is an experience one needs to let happen in order to see where spirit would have you go next. It can be scary, it can be daunting but if you feel the prodding from within, take heed…there is an opportunity that awaits and it may bring exactly what your soul needs to fulfill its path her on earth.
12 thoughts on “Changing Trajectory and Shedding Skin”
Thank you Odette for being so authentic in sharing this. I have a dad the same age as your mum who is unwell and many other challenges going on. I am so grateful to have the shamanic path, to know I never walk alone on this path. Blessings to you x
You are most welcome Christina. Blessings to you and your father. And indeed we never walk alone wherever we go ❤
And you get to have a cat! Bonus! 🙂 We live next door to my mum. Of course there can be frustrations on both sides, but we are also good company for each other, and when she goes, I won’t feel like I neglected her or missed good times spent with her. Mind you, I sometimes think she will outlive me. 😀
Odette you are very courageous. I love your resonance and feel your power and the sacred inner space that you hold for so many. My guides told me recently – EVERYTHING is a test around self love. Everything is a test around our honest joy preference. To accept a role that will be challenging simply takes you into deeper places than before to find self love. To love another so deeply, IS self love – it is true love. You know how to keep your light strong. 🙂 Blessings dear sister! Alicia Power
Hi Alicia thank you for the lovely feedback and sharing. Blessing to you within and without ❤
This is lovely, Odette and speaks to so many aspects of my life. I currently have my 90 year old dad living with me. He has dementia and has his ups and downs, as do we all. He is a great gift in my life, letting me see the joy in paring down to our true essence. He is a simple man of generous spirit and, in that, a reminder of how to live in the moment. Could I have permission to pass this peice on? I would be posting it to a secret group of individuals who have experienced, or are in the throes of, a specific type of trauma. I think it could do a lot of good there. It is a very powerful message and they would be a receptive audience. I appreciate whatever your decision is. Thank you, be well.
Hi Francine. Of course you may. Blessings to you both and in gratitude for your sharing. xxx
This feels very right to me, Odette, and I’m not at all surprised by the timing – which really is fortuitous, when you look at the pattern overall. Hope we can have a coffee together somewhere before you go, and if there’s anything i can do, let me know.
Thanks Danny. Will be down that way off and on over the next two months so will contact and yes lets catch up ❤ Hugs
HI Odette, Thank you so much for sharing your changing with me, for I too am going through changes and even connecting in unexpected ways. Right now, I am preparing to walk the “Strange Road to Santiago” in Spain, and spirit is placing so many beautiful spirits in my path. Just felt compelled to reach out to you. Love, Karean
Those who give love gather love. Date: Mon, 27 Apr 2015 00:57:06 +0000 To: firstname.lastname@example.org
You are most welcome Karean. Blessings on your journey. I know another spirit sister is being called to the same path. She just has to wait a year or so till her son finishes school. Methinks changes are upon us all in great degree at the moment. ❤ Safe travels ❤
Your presence has been a companion for my own path for a while now, ever since I found your beautiful page on facebook. Not infrequently I felt the wish of writing to you, get in touch somehow. This post of yours really moved me. First and foremost, I’d like to send you all the loving and caring vibes, having in mind n heart this powerful moment of your life. I’ve recently (and currently, cause it’s an ongoing process) been through some dramatic changes in my life which, though different than yours in nature, have made me completely “reset” my aura, my disposition, my goals.
I’m an artist by heart, have been singing and composing for many years, and always connected with the importance of inner travel for self-healing and expansion. Also, with the idea of art as a healing path that could be even more potent if shared. Finaly, the acute moments of transformation I’ve been through in late times pointed me to the path of service clearly. I sincerely appreciate your approach to shamanic and healing practices, and would love to talk to you somehow and receive your guiding. Unfortunately I can’t attend the retrieval personally at the moment, cause I live rather far from you (in Spain) and have no budget for traveling right now. In fact, budget and professional goals are in a transformative turmoil right now. I learned that you provide skype sessions though? Please let me know if and how we could get in touch. Thanks a lot! Love, Su